Ankh: Gods of Egypt

Kemet (2012) was essentially a board game port of the 1994 science-fiction/action movie Stargate, starring Kurt Russell, who plays depressed and traumatized air force colonel Jack O'Neill, and James Spader, who plays dorky and sneezy archaeologist, linguist, and Egyptologist, Dr. Daniel Jackson. Kemet: Blood and Sand (2021) was the same movie in 4K. By that reasoning, Ankh: Gods of Egypt (2021), designed by Eric M. Land and published by CMON, is, well, what Stargate would have been had there been no pesky Earthlings to yuk the yum of super beings much higher up on the Kardashev scale—such as the extraterrestrial that the aforementioned pesky Earthlings knew as “Ra.” Perhaps it’s a bit ridiculous and the epitome of human hubris to compare board games and 1990s action movies to intergalactic alien god conflicts (Stargate was a documentary, right?) But how else are we supposed to make sense of the immensity of the cosmos? Plus, the seriousness of intergalactic alien god conflicts on the other side of the universe pales in comparison to how seriously the production team of any 1990s action movie took their craft. Just ask Jean-Claude Van Damme.

So, join Pete as he unboxes Ankh: Gods of Egypt, where an Egyptian god battles for supremacy against another Egyptian god, and against another Egyptian god, and against potentially up to two more Egyptian gods, depending on how many people you have over for game night.

Heck, you may even consider inviting over an Egyptologist and get their input on the game. By the bye, never try to pick up an Egyptologist while claiming to be an Egyptologist if you are, indeed, not an Egyptologist. It will take them about three seconds to call you out. Trust us on this one. But, that’s really a whole other thing…much like Stargate SG-1 and its 37 spinoff series, including Stargate: Underwater, Stargate: Scenic Mountain Goat Hike, and Stargate: Back on Arrakis—This Time It’s Personal.