Oltréé
Rick: Hey Pete, do you ever wish you could be a ranger—writing, tracking, and moving through the wilderness, finding adventure, fighting injustice, protecting the poor and the downtrodden, and having an undeniable code of personal honor that seems to be lost in modern society?
Pete: What? Do you mean like in a LARP or a tabletop RPG?
Rick: No, I mean like for real. In real life.
Pete: I could give it a go at a ren fair for a day.
Rick: No, for real. This will be your life.
Pete: So—living in the world with no internet, no penicillin, bad personal hygiene, and nonexistent nutrition? Yeah, that’s a hard pass.
Rick: What about the “personal honor” bit?
Pete: Like putting milk on the shopping list after you drink the last of it so your roommates don’t come home to no milk?
Rick: No, a little bit more than that.
Pete: Like actually watching the corporate video trainings before you sign a form saying that, in fact, you watched corporate video trainings—rather than just taking the nonsense test at the end and calling it good?
Rick: No, definitely less than that.
Pete: Oh, you mean like being able to keep things in perspective and not verbally taking out the circumstances of your crappy life on your local barista when they make your iced, half-caff, large, extra-hot, sugar-free vanilla latte with 2% rather than skim milk?
Rick: Exactly. Nailed it.
Pete: Okay, I can get on board with that.
Rick: Cool. Then I need you to unbox Oltréé (2021), designed by Antoine Bauza and John Grümph and published by Studio H for the channel.
Pete: Alright, I can do that. Wait—hang on. What if your barista screws up your stuff two days in a row?
Rick: Oh well, all bets are off then. You can unsheathe your sword, pull them over the counter by their silly little apron, tie them up, throw them on the back of your horse, gallop off, and abandon them in the woods somewhere. That’s totally fine.
Pete: Uh, do you think we should have some sort of disclaimer at the end of this delightful repartee in case somebody actually tries any of this, ends up on the 6 o’clock news, and then points back to our show notes?
Rick: Probably a good idea. Ours is a litigious society in 2022, and there is absolutely no perspective or personal honor.
Pete: We are not sure who among our fanbase may need this message, but whoever you are, please note: Do not assault or kidnap your local barista. Not for any reason. Also: Do not commit fraud on corporate documents. Replacing your roommate’s milk is not required, though smiled upon. Finally, please take time every day to be mindfully grateful for living in a world with penicillin. For all of you out there who manage to consume Corax & Coffee content morally, ethically, and safely without this disclaimer, we are forever grateful for your existence and patronage.
